The Cap’n’s Wafers

Well,
Yer sure to be a damn sight safer
If ye keep yer hooks off the
Cap’n’s Wafers…

But thirsty pirates cry to savor
Rum with crumbs of
Cap’n’s Wafers

“Ye saucy wench, go fetch the tray fer
Grog to wash down
Cap’n’s Wafers!”

Fer that booty, pirates gave her
Looted loads of
Cap’n’s Wafers

Buccaneers arr even brave
Swashbuckling under
Cap’n’s Wafers

Mutineers arr sold to slavers
Slavering fer
Cap’n’s Wafers

Natives tricked by sly palaver
Trade their pearls fer
Cap’n’s Wafers

Mermaids sing as they display their
Treasure chests fer
Cap’n’s Wafers

Freebooters groom the beards they favor
Combing out the
Cap’n’s Wafers

At Queen’s decree, the Navy shaves her
Privateers fer
Cap’n’s Wafers!

Yer sure to be a damn sight safer,
If ye keep yer hooks off the
Cap’n’s Wafers.